Confessions of a 20-Something Caffeine Addict

...on caffeine-free nursing diet. God Help Us.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

baby dream

Last night I had another baby dream...

It was sort of vague and I can hardly remember all the details, but the feelings are still strong. I must have given birth to the baby, and perhaps it was a little early (like it was supposed to be premie). So they hand me this baby and it's about 2 inches long. It looks like a worry people (or worry doll) wrong in a handkerchief. I'm trying to "cradle" this thing in my arms and I drop it a few times. Of course I'm going crazy b/c first of all why is the baby so small and look like a doll? and Why can't I cradle him/her like a normal baby? How will I feed it? I doubt it's mouth is large enough to nurse! And besides, I think it may not be alive...there is no animation or cries. Apparently the nurses made a mistake so they replace this baby with a slightly larger one, however the face looks like that of a child's doll! Same issues: it's too small to cradle, it won't feed or cry or move. I think I woke up around this point.

a strange dream. what's new!

Last weekend was wonderful. Hiney (as I like to call her b/c she has a nice one!) was in town for a few nights and I almost wanted to cry. It was incredibly refreshing having a real friend around: one that is interested in my life and wants me to know about hers, one that can laugh at the crappy parts of life and has hope, one that get's my elephant jokes and will hold my hand without fear of people thinking we're lesbians (hahaha). though she was here for a short time and I had to work during the day, I was so sad to have to leave her at the station. I want her back! But luckily this one's a traveller and she'll most likely be the first visitor we'll have in Florence :) AND I'll see her at the wedding in a couple of weeks so I can't complain too much. She's such a good listener and really helped me work through my feelings about career change and what I want out of life...while still serving Christ. I know that sounds very holy-roller, but hey that's me! I'm still cool ;)

She told me about some schools here in the US that offer Master's degrees that you can earn completely online! I could be all the way in Florence and be working on master's here in the US! well it's just a thought, and there's still tons of research to do. Plus I need to get work in Italy first anyway. School next.

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