Confessions of a 20-Something Caffeine Addict

...on caffeine-free nursing diet. God Help Us.

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

did I mention I am terrible at blogging?

oh how things change so quickly and subtly and then all of the sudden you don't recognize the last few months.

the band broke up in September. I wasn't there. Chicago was. The wind blew him home on a red-eye b/c he couldn't stand to be with them for the ride home. I can't blame him. He's been fighting the urge to give-up since he proposed, and now the irony of life rears it's bald, bumpy head. but things aren't all bad. as I am beginning to learn, networking goes a long way. He applied to a couple of great schools in the City, but through a former teacher's elbow-rubbing skills, Milan is calling us. hoping that his visit to Italy with his Latvian companion will give us an answer as to what the fall will bring next year.

believe me...I relish the day I am walking Margot down a Navigli street through flats of veggies and crates of live chickens to grab a double espresso and read al fresco. but it's a lot of work trying to leave. and on multiple levels. current battles: convincing my mother that I am not leaving her (even though I am already 2000mi away), money? what money?, will he get citizenship...and so on. And speaking of relish, I can't help but fantasize about pulling the hd aside to inform him/her that I will no longer be requiring employment, as Italy is calling and needs me there immediately. maybe I'm a little too presumtuous about the hd's feelings, but I can imagine even just a little jealousy, can't I?

of course my visions of this move are quite idealistic. can't just pick up the phone at 7pm to call momma and ask her how to cook a rump roast...she'd be sure to suffer from a massive heart attack and be half-dressed ready to go pick me up at the nearest hospital from my assumed trauma to the head before I can say "and I know you've taught me before" I'm sure I'll call anyway, but that's not the point. good-bye professional designer with median benefits and most holidays off, hello au-pair/low-paid english teacher/dog-walker/"windex your windows sir?" but fortunately my parents reared me to have no shame, so I may be taking things more lightly than one would expect.

Other interesting facts of the past 5 months? none
-but really, I have very little hair left to cut, dad's not delighted, I like it
-Margot needs to go on a diet. He has decided she must have real meat at each meal. Unrelated
-still haven't met any peers of my own here, not sure if that is a bad thing
-M-I-L and S/F-I-L still wierd
-the fam came to visit in July, fun and embarassing as usual! I love it!
-I think I have officially lost touch with anyone I would have considered a friend from back home. on a scale of one to ten, one being total abandonment and ten being 30 minutes each night on the phone, I score about a -2 for keeping in touch. it's how I'm built. it's depressing.
-I still feel dissatisfied with my profession. I doubt I am alone. That helps.

peace and stinky geese...may the horse be with you