false alarm

last night I thought my water broke. it was a false alarm...before I knew it was, I was almost disappointed that it was coming so early! I called my doula and my midwife at 11pm, and felt like a right freak for being so paranoid. Honestly, thought, the way it happened I don't think I could have slept without knowing for sure.

so for now Giada is still kicking the shit out of my ribs, and is currently leaping for joy (literally) or for sugar rush over the huge hunk of pecan pie I just ate. I'd leap too, but not in my current watermelon-belly state.

I am hoping once things settle a little after this wee one escapes my womb, if it DOES settle at all, that with 12 weeks of leave that I will have more time to blog. I'm sure it'll be one of the last things I'll be thinking of after changing stinky dipes and nursing a hungry baby every two hours, BUT hopefully I'll be dying to connect with someone, even if it's just the computer screen and my imagination of 1000 lurkers coming to my blog each day in hopes of witty writing and slide-splitting humor.

2 years

Today is our 2nd anniversary. Adam and I have been legally hitched since October 2004 by the State of Louisiana. I think it cost around $50, plus an extra $6 to get a pretty embossed certificate mailed to our door.

the weather was perfect...a little warm but it made going into the air-conditioned cathedral a huge relief. I decided to cut my hair the morning of the wedding. It was down to the middle of my back and I cut it to my shoulders! I really loved it (though now I think I was crazy...I'd kill for a pony-tail!)

There were no major hang-ups. I had trouble getting Adam's ring on, but it did go on eventually (large knuckles). At one point, the cantor's voice cracked and adam and I could barely keep ourselves from laughing...in fact I made contact with the videographer (who could hear everything we were saying through the lapel mic) and he gave me a big smile. It was a Catholic wedding, so during the "Ave Maria" we walked over to the statue of the Virgin Mary to offer her a rose. Adam, being the graceful man that he is, THREW the rose up onto the pedestal! Everyone chuckled, and it was forgotten once we went to present roses to our mothers.

Originally there was a lot of controversy regarding our wedding. Believe it or not (I'm not very preachy) though I hate the way it sounds, I suppose I'd be considered a devout Catholic. Adam is NOT. He was baptized as an infant, but his parents raised him in many different Christian denominations, mostly protestant/born-again types. After a lot of conversation and thought, I convinced the priest to let us have a full mass. Also, unlike most weddings in the States, we were horrified at the idea of the men wearing tuxedos or plain black suits that have been rented....blecgh (not sure I spelled that correctly, harharhar). SOOOO, we HUNTED and HUNTED and SHOPPED and BEGGED, and finally found something cool and affordable for 5 rock stars with little to no steady income. Gray suits from (believe it or not) H&M!, with black pins stripes. Adam's brother is an artist and he silk screened a red guitar motif on the left breast of the white shirts. They wore green ties, and I have to say they all looked amazing! The ladies wore kelly-green tea length dresses of a satiny/taffita fabric, with netting at the hem.

***this is getting WAY too detailed...apologies***

our reception was also a little off-character of most weddings for many reasons mostly b/c A) we love GOOD food and B) we love good music. We rented out an amazing restaurant that specializes in fine Louisiana cuisine, which has a lot of french influence (lobster bisque, rabbit pate, some kind of yummy duck...are you drooling?). We had an open bar, including cocktails, which is great because all I ended up ingesting was a bit of cake and two gin & tonics!!! The cake had praline filling. Okay so that wasn't so special but it sure was yummy.

Aside from all of the technical crap, it was an incredible day. We were both smiling uncontrollably, and were so glad that our reception had been so intimate and personal. We spent one night in New Orleans then flew to Quebec City for two weeks. The honeymoon was all that I imagined it would be....lots of se--....NOT!! okay there was THAT, but it was also about being extremely LAZY, lying on the giant feather bed for HOURS, finding a bottle of Port in our room upon arriving the first night, having fabulous breakfast every morning and then going back upstairs to find our room already made, AVEDA hotel soaps, a turned-down room with chocolates when we returned each evening, and the best part...an INCREDIBLE BATHROOM with a HUGE clear glass tub, and a HUGE shower that I could have lived in!

Many people have given us advice "the first year is the hardest," "love is a choice not a feeling," "try to always remember how it felt before you got married." As honored as I am to have been given that advice, I wonder if true love really requires all of these efforts and mind-sets? Adam and I have had our share of fights and arguments and tears over the past 24 months, but not once have I questioned my decision to marry him. I don't look back on the first year and feel ANY sense of turmoil or hardship. Though I do CHOOSE to love him, I also can't help myself when I am around him...I'm still crazy about him, and I get the same feelings I got the first time I saw him standing in the snow smoking a clove cigarette. Perhaps there are some apprehensive feelings that we will never have again, but in turn we never have to wonder if we are just playing around or looking for a good time. Last night we laid in bed giggling about something silly, and I just can't describe how happy those moments make me. I do know that things will change in just 4 very short weeks, but I have faith that it will be for the better and that Adam will give me even MORE reason to CHOOSE and FEEL love for him. He is my life and my breath...I think I would shrivel and die without him.

**BLOGGER WON'T LET ME ADD PHOTOS SO CHECK BACK LATER FOR THE "ILLUSTRATED" VERSION***

more wedding pics, I am still working on uploading the rest of them...2 years later...ha!

creme brutal

the ladies at work took me out to dinner last night, which was absolutely delicious. but the best part of the night was when I threw my allergy diet out the window and ordered coffee flavored creme brulee. OH...MY...GOD. I forgot what it was like to eat rich egg-y, milk-y food. It was amazing, and even came with a berry puree (except it wasn't pureed? they were just sort of crushed). When I got home I had to sit in the bath for half an hour while I sneezed and coughed my brains out (but I tucked them back in so everything seems to be working okay!). It was well worth the torture, but it will be a while before I indulge again!

if you think that one was weird...

I am almost too embarrassed to post this...but then again, no one I have ever met reads this (as far as I know) so it's probably the safest place to reveal myself...

I don't recall how this one began...it begins where I remember feeling as though I had an ankle weight on my left foot. I sat down and reached down to my ankle (which these days is a feat in and of itself). I lifted my pant leg to find that I had TWO sets of TESTICLES!!!! growing out of it...one set on each side. There was no feeling in them, but I could feel where they were growing out of my skin (they were hair free....phew! shaving nightmare...hehhee). I was so mortified and all I wanted to do was find my mother to ask her if this was a common side effect of the hormones of pregnancy. I put on a nice long pair of socks and "tucked" my new packages inside, pulled down my pant leg, and found her. DAMN IT! she said is was NOT normal. I decided to check out my right leg, and discovered that there were two 1/2" diameter breasts growing out of the front of my ankle, and they were a little bloody where it looked like I was scratching them thinking they were mosquito bites. The next thought that came to my head was that since I couldn't feel any of my new found growths, that a doctor could just cut them off, stitch up the wound, and that would be that!

I then woke up, found my ankles under the sheets (testicle and mini-breast free), and went to the bathroom for a pee...again.

HOLY CRAP...that one takes the cake. My friend Justin thinks the dream represents my unconscious desire to have a boy more than a girl...hence two full-sized sets of balls vs. one miniature set of breasts. Maybe he's right...if it's unconscious especially b/c then I wouldn't be aware of it, right? One thing's for sure...that was a weird dream and I don't want to have it again...scary!

Episiotomies!

Last night:

I was in labor, in a room with another laboring woman. Adam wasn't there, b/c I think I went into labor kind of early so he couldn't get there fast enough. I forgot to call my mid-wife, and I started to panic b/c I knew they were going to try to give me Pitocin and all that junk. The active labor was taking a long time, and in my dream I remember trying so hard to feel the contraction and worrying b/c I couldn't feel it.

Finally the nurse, who actually wasn't a nurse but my Bradley teacher, said that I was crowning, which was weird b/c I hadn't actually gotten to transition yet! (as if I know how that feels anyway) She then told me to get on the floor, and I knew that something weird was going on. (feel free to laugh out loud) She told me to lift my legs into the hair, but spread apart. She pulled out a big pair of scissors. And I screamed "Wait what are you doing!?" She said she as giving me an episiotomy. And I got so confused b/c I was pretty sure she wasn't a fan of episiotomies. So I told her "I don't want one...but hey where is a my mid-wife, and wouldn't you help to support the perineum to help me avoid a tear??" But I couldn't put my legs down...

Then I woke up and I think I was having a practice contraction. And I had to pee...again.

ch- ch- check it out..

Check out my hubby's blog if you haven't had a chance...it's worth the read!

I know I am being a lazy blogger pawning both (haha) my readers off on Adam today, but I'm pregnant...and that excuse seems to work for me right now!