Confessions of a 20-Something Caffeine Addict

...on caffeine-free nursing diet. God Help Us.

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

a chef I am not

for the long weekend (Monday was Memorial Day here in the states, a dat to commemorate the members of the United States armed forces who were killed in war) we decided to host a barbeque at our new digs. we have been planning this day for about a month now...not so much that it required that much time, just that we were excited about finally having a party at our place.

Lulou came in from Queens to spend the night and rest of the next day with us. We all woke up Sunday, went to mass (10 minutes late of course) then to Whole Foods to do some damage. We bought fresh avocados for guacamole, nice lean meat for burgers (and veggie burgers for the vegans, which there are a-plenty in our circle), corn chips, salad ingredients, and of course good beer. We were so excited about our friends indulging in all this organic, tasty food that we were going to prepare! We picked up our other good friend JD on the way home, and the four of us began to prepare for the party.

DH made a delicious salad with strawberries (yum) and sweet peppers. Lu made cookies. JD prepared the vegan treats (he's a vegan so he knows the ropes). I made the guacamole (which was INCREDIBLE if I might say so!), and then moved on to slicing the pickles. We got a mandolin as a wedding gift (not the musical instrument, then slicer silly!) Because I am just so AMAZING in general, and especially AMAZING at knife/slicer handling, I found it completely unnecessary to use the guard to push the pickles across the blade. About 3 pickles into slicing, my thumb got in the way, and the side of it was sliced off as well.

That's right, a big hunk of thumb was sliced right off, save a half a millimeter of skin it was dangling from. My first words "AW SHIT!"...then "Make sure there's no blood in the pickles"...and "Thank God it was on the thin slice setting!" DH insisted on taking me to the emergency room. Of course I'm all "it's FINE, I'll just put a bandaid on and that will hold the skin on." Of course once I actually took the time to run it under water and felt the pain and saw the blood, I figured he had something.

The hospital was full of home improvement accidents, lots of broken ankles and deep cuts. Some looked perfectly fine...perhaps people lonely on a holiday weekend just wanting some human contact and attention. When we finally got into a room the size of a bathroom stall, my thumb was bleeding like mad and throbbing. The first doctor (b/c apperently it takes two?) made me run it under the faucet. I screamed "HOLY SHIT!" I swear, for a small cut it felt like I was having my fingernails ripped out. I then turned red when I saw crying boy sitting outside my door with a broken arm. He stopped crying, so perhaps I did him a favor, however I still felt like a sissy for cussing over such a minor problem!

3 1/2 hours and 2 incompetant ER doctors later, my skin-flap was superglued onto my thumb (yay dermabond, no stitches) and I looked like I was in constant need of a ride due the HUGE bandage on my poor crippled finger. [I changed the dressings last night and it looks disgusting] My luck my thumb will heal up, but I'll have a nice dent in the side of it forever!

We missed a few people who had to leave early, but overall the night wasn't so bad! Some of us walked to the beach at midnight. It was so peaceful and quiet, and there's something about walking in the dark through the woods.

The only frustration was Lu. She has changed. So long as it's just Adam, JD and I, she is fine, but according to JD, once we left for the hospital, she freaked out. She wouldn't talk to anyone and even disappeared to the beach at one point. And it's not like these people are strangers to her. As soon as we got back, we knew she'd be ready to go to the train station. All she said was "Why didn't you call?!?!?!" (there's a cell phone block in the hospital) and "they drank ALL the beer" (isn't that what it's for?) Our friend Gio volunteered to take her to the station so that we could stay and enjoy the remnants of our company. She refused and said "[DH] is going to take me" So in order to keep the peace and not totally blowup at Lu in front of company, Adam AND Gio brought her to the station.

WHAT GALL!!!! how could she do that? She is so goddam selfish, and this is really the last straw. I don't think that I can hang around with her anymore. It's sad b/c we've been friends for seven years, we're both from LA, and she's really my only "girlfriend," but this friendship has been fading for a while. I keep offering her a clean slate (As does DH, for my sake), but her negative attitude and intolerance for our friends, for whatever reason, is disgusting and hurtful. Much of her disdain for them is rationalized in her mind by her "christian" convictions: they drink too much, use foul language, and their conversations can be crass. But they are some of the most amazing people I've ever met: they'd do anything for us, and took care of me while DH was touring months at a time, yes they're a bit raw, but they are honest and open, I know them better than I'll ever know Lu. They flew to Louisiana for our wedding, and I can barely get her to pay for a train ticket to visit me. What's ironic is that if I don't call her/invite her out, she acts hurt and left out. GOD HELP ME!!!! what should I do?????

Thursday, May 25, 2006

why I like being Catholic

first of all, I know I am probably going to get a million responses, and from people who've never even shown their face (or whatever) on my blog before, but that's okay. But I just want all commenters to know that I KNOW! I've tried almost every major (and some minor) christian denomination, and even some non-christian. I understand that many protestants don't like being referred to as such. I know that the Catholic church is not considered evangelical, which among other things means its people are not saved, or going to heaven (with exceptions). I KNOW most anything you'll disagree with, but that's okay. The point is that I am Catholic now, and will remain until I return to the earth.

This is in response/support of fellow blogger:

One of the many reasons why I returned to Catholicism is the faith vs. works issue. This has been a hot topic between me and many friends, including my husband who is not Catholic. Something I could never dismiss while learning about the new church that I was in was the idea that you did not need to live a life of good works in order to enter "God's Kingdom." A biblical study I found once in regards to this issue can illustrate the difference in Luke 2:14:

"Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men." King James Version, and most other popular protestant-used bibles are stated this way.

"Glory to God in the highest and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests." New American Bible, used by Catholics and protestants alike

This was generally the passage that was used in defense of my confusion, the first version I should say. It is what the angel proclaimed to Mary and Joseph on the night of Christ's birth. As if to say "Glory to God, let there be peace, God blesses everyone." The second, to me of course, has a very different tone, as if to say "Glory to God and he will give peace to those who please him."

Now, in my mind an angel almost ALWAYS appears to give instruction or to make a very important announcement (like, yo Mary you're gonna have a baby!). Why would the angel just come down to bless them? To me he is telling them that God is to be given glory, and that people who please him will be given peace. SO if we do things here on earth (GOOD WORKS) God will grant us the gift of peace, and hopefully a ticket through the pearly gates.

Good works...again, to me....are things that are born of love...love for God, love of his creation, love of family, love of the rest of the world as ugly as it may be. And these actions/decisions/thoughts are difficult because you have to try to be fair to all of these things (god, family, etc.). But they also can lead you on many adventures and color your life in ways you could never imagine. The fact that I believe I am called to good works forces me to takes chances and to be adventurous, and to get by on less than I ever could have imagined. And I can't just wait for God to come down and say "I'm taking you to Italy. It will be fun and amazing". Nope, I have to say "wow, that could be cool, but what about this baby, what about my family?" and weight the +'s and -'s and just take a chance and trust that God will PROVIDE me with the tools I need to press on, not wait for him to press on for me.

There are consequences to a life of good works. You will most likely be met with persecution and discouragement (is that a word?). You are choosing to take the unlit, unbeaten path. It's not like you decide to follow Christ and the rest of your life will just fall into place. No way. When you choose this path your are CHOOSING broken ankles and pain, loss...of people and of things, lonliness even. But the beautiful thing is (as you've said annika) that you will surprise yourself with your strength and ability to be made anew, with the wisdom you will gain, and your depth of knowledge about this world (which in turn deepens your knowledge of the immaterial world). You will learn and grow and never be want for adventure and change. It's not leaping from a cliff trusting God will send angels to catch you. It's climbing down a steep mountain trusting God provided you with all that you need to descend safely.

I hope this makes sense....it does in my head/heart. This is not intended to be a comparison of Catholic vs. Protestant as it is faith vs. good works. I am sure there are many christians out there, non-catholic, that may agree with this idea. Nor am I asserting that I have become this person I know I should be...I've got a long way to go!

Peace.

NOTE: I am adding this last part in b/c I realized how this completely doesn't tie into the post I was refering to!

The point of all of this was that I can't imagine that someone who lives their life doing good things for others, spreading love and happiness, and even has a moral code set out for themselves...I can't imagine it can be wrong. In fact as far as "heaven" goes...I think they will be in God's favor over someone who has been "saved", but lives his/her life vicariously just waiting to die and go to heaven, all the while judging anyone who hasn't been "saved."

I agree with annika that we have to take responsibility for our actions and decisions and thoughts. And once we take ownership for these things, I think she is right...we do notice the wind at our backs and our load becomes lighter.

thanks for your thoughts annika. may your life be full of love and adventure!

weather pixie

i've decided to copy a few of the blogs I've been reading and add some weather pixies to my page. I have one for NY, Florence, and for my hometown in Louisiana. Hey look! NY and Italy have the same weather! well I guess it was meant to be...I don't even have to buy new clothes (awwwwwww I will anyway).
  • hey guess what

  • i just learned how to make lists

  • this doesn't mean anything about my website making abilities

  • yay!

    Monday, May 22, 2006

    I want to bite out someone's throat


    this is how I feel today.

    SITUATION: our company is reworking their website. FACT: my supervisor and I are the only ones in the who know how to propertly operate a computer. As a result I get to develop most of our digital graphics and marketing material. ANOTHER FACT: the newest employee, who is "senior" to me based on experience, isn't any different than all the others...yet he makes an effort to learn, which is fine by me. HOWEVER, he's got a very long way to go. Anyway, the POINT: he and my supervisor, as just announced this morning, are going to be developing our new website.

    WTF! I have already started creating a template and updated graphics, even! I found out he went to one of the owners, behind the supervisors back even, to talk to him about it. I am f**king LIVID (sorry kids). I could spit in his face, but I kind of need this job right now, so I won't. Thank God I only have...(counting)...6 more months of this bullshit.

    [NOTE: I don't speak like this in front of strangers usually, only in front loved ones (hahaha), but I have a feeling that those of you who actually read this aren't


    sure, I am hurt because I wanted to work on the website, but more than anything I am dumbfounded at how illogical a decision this is. Seriously, it makes no sense whatsoever. Not to mention that this person has also just taken on more repsonsibility in another area. GRRRRRRR Where do they make these kinds of people, and how did they all end up in this office? there must me a dumb-people factory nearby that I don't know about. Praise the Lord I was born in Louisiana! The dumb people are distributed properly there! hahaha

    well, I will end on that note, b/c that's about as happy as it gets today.

    slugs and hisses....I mean hugs and kisses

    Saturday, May 20, 2006

    shopping

    As forecasted, it was an insane idea to drive all the way to the mall yesterday. We sat in traffic for, oh, about an hour and 15 minutes...at trip that should normally take around 25 minutes [what is ironic here is that we were driving TOWARDS NYC, and on Fridays a large part of the world is driving AWAY from NYC...this anomaly would and could only happen to me and DH]. And that time calculates only the part of the drive that was intended, NOT the part where we were on the wrong parkway for a good 4 miles and had to exit to get to the OTHER parkway and head back those 4 miles to the actually exit we needed. We were both starving about halfway there, so once we arrived we circled the horrific food court approximately 4 times avoiding which terribly unhealthy food choice to make. He got a soggy knish and I got half a tuna on rye...and they were both nasty, tasteless, and too salty.

    so on to the shopping. I ended up spending most of my money: some really cute knit tops, an adorable linen shirt great for wearin a wide belt over, some white sailor-ish pants, jean board shorts, and a DRESS...yes I found a dress.

    it looks kind of like this, but the blue is kelly green, the sleeves and neckline are brown, and the side panels are red and orange (I think). I figure that if I wear the right shoes and accessories it should look appropriate for an evening wedding? what do you think? I should mention that the wedding is in LA, and it is VERY hot there, so lighter clothes are more common at night.

    DH didn't do as well. he wears his clothes to fit, and here in the US everything is cut for people who are overweight. he is about 3"(about 8cm) taller than me, and weighs about the same, so it's VERY diffucult to find anything that fits him and doesn't look baggy without alterations (one thing he LOVES about Italy/Europe....clothes actually FIT!!!). He found some great leather summer shoes and some jeans, a pair of pants, and a linen tunic-like shirt. I haven't seen any of it on, but I'm sure it looks great. he looks great in anything. Even nothing! HA! he's gonna kill me;) So that just means that we have to go shopping again and/or go into NYC and shop wear they know how clothes fit.

    tonight we are going to a party at our friends house. this friend was the pianist in the band R.I.P. Anyway, it should be fun and funny. Lots of old groupies will probably show up and want to talk to me like we are best friends. It's cute but annoying. I'll feel huge and old around these starved girls. But DH will be there and always makes me feel beautiful and wanted, so who can complain? God, it's funny...I've never been a BIG drinker, aside from 2 or 3 nights of craziness, but knowing I can't have a beer or a cocktail drives me CRAZY!!! I think I might make my own batch of non-alcoholic cosmos, or gin and tonics minus the gin, just to trick myself into believing I can still party, heehee. Oh my, gin and tonic. yum.

    i need a manicure and a pedicure. i really just need a stranger to rub my hands and feet and shoulders (knees and toes, knees and toes! great song)

    Friday, May 19, 2006

    Living Up to My Blog Name

    a real confession...

    I am having a really WEIRD pregnancy thing. The hair down the center of my tummy, which is normally a little brown when I haven't been in the sun and is emphasized by my pastey white skin (yes, I'm part dark Irish), has decided that it's not dark enough! Dear Lord! as if I need another physical trait to fixate on and beat myself up over! LUCKILY (see, God, I am looking at the bright side...the very shady and damp and cold bright side) it's not BLACK and it's not coarse either, thank you very much. But still...what the hell and I gonna do? my first thought is to used some of my facial bleach and pray it doesn't look like a big blonde stripe down the center of my abdomen. Or I can wait patiently for the weather to cooperate, and lay-out by the pool rubbing lemon juice on my belly (mmmm lemonade). OR I can be even more patient and hope that this will all go away post-partum. any thoughts fellow bloggers/lurkers? As if it isn't crappy enough that I am at the point in my pregnancy where I don't look pregnant, but chubby.

    OH YES! I forgot...the OB...well all we did today was listen to the heartbeat BUT it was the first time we heard it, and it sounded beautiful and strong and steady. I was in and out in 15 minutes! that's a lifetime record for me. We are getting our first full-fledged ultrasound in 5 weeks, then we'll see him again a week later. I think he's trying to get me in one the month (I'll be 20 weeks by then). I am so excited, and we should be able to find out the sex of the baby by then!!! yayayay!

    It is POURING rain over here on Long Island. It has actually been raining all week, sans yesterday. It is SO hard to wake up when it is raining outside. I wish I could just roll over and smother DH while listening to the rain and falling back into dream land. Anyway, the entire sky is gray, and despite the weather, DH and I are trucking over to the mall to spend some extra money I earned doing some design work on the side. Woohoo! I am looking forward to buying some "in-between" clothes and a dress for my old best-friend's wedding at which I am singing (one day I'll post wedding pics, and you'll discover that he was my male bridal attendant! what a trooper! and I say "old" because he lives in North Carolina and I live in in NY and we never catch each other while we're home in LA...it's complicated).

    so obviously I am doing nothing at work today, so I had better go and make these last 15 minutes count (HA!).

    Thursday, May 18, 2006

    And I truly believe that, except of course when it comes to a massage.

    DH's birthday is coming up, and I am so proud of myself for having bought half of his gifts a full month in advance. Lucky for me one of his birthday gifts, which we got a while back, are tickets to see Rufus Wainwright. It's going to be an amazing show. He is playing with a full orchestra at Carnegie Hall in NYC, and will be performing the legendary 1961 Judy Garland concert. And as if that weren't amazing enough...we are sitting in the 4th row thanks to a friend of ours who "knows people."

    If I were a gay man, I'd stalk Rufus Wainwright. His music is amazing...rock, classical, operatic, folk, pop all rolled into one. If you haven't heard any of his music, I'd suggest listening to his album "Want One" first. It has the greatest mix of sounds. "Want Two," his latest album, is incredible too, but I think you have to get to know him first to appreciate it....but I could be wrong :) My favorite song at the moment is "I don't know what it is" I just want to do giant leaps and spins around the room when I turn it up loud.

    Interesting factoids: in the beginning of the movie The Aviator at the Cocoanut Grove, Rufus plays the club singer, and then before they leave the club his father, Loudon (a successful folk singer popular in the 70s), is performing also. Loudon also plays the mayor in the movie Big Fish, among other small roles in TV shows and films.

    I'm not obsessed really.

    but back to DH. I'd love to divulge the details of his gifts, but he may decide to check out my blog, which he's done in the past, and then the surprise will be ruined or "ROONED" as he likes to say....not sure why.

    and yes yael, I must agree that my husband is HOT STUFF. why else would I have married him??? hahaha j/k that's just a lucky perk.

    we have our next OB appointment tomorrow, and I am very excited...we're hoping he takes the sonogram again so we can see how big he/she has gotten PLUS we may be able to find out the sex of the baby! we are 15 weeks today (oh my god!)

    Wednesday, May 17, 2006

    just wanted to say hi...

    i am dead with thoughts today, but I just wanted to let you know that I was thinking about you, my blog reader...you are one among very few. I don't have much to say, except that I ate some miso soup today with my new japanese soup spoon. Ikea rocks my socks. I think my hormones are getting the best of me today, so apologize for this numb entry. I promise I'll do better next time, y'all! xoxox

    Sunday, May 14, 2006

    1st mother's (to-be) day

    so I just have to say that my husband is perfect. maybe not for anyone else, but for me he is perfect beyond perfect. I always underestimate him, and end up being the ass, and yet somehow I'll do it again.

    the past few months have been rough, not really knowing how he's felt about the baby, and how much I could talk about it without "offending" him. I want to give him the time and space to process this change and let him deal with it on his own. I assumed he was still dealing.

    this morning I woke-up to find a card and small black bag next to the bed. I actually didn't see it until after I used the bathroom. I sat down on the bed and DH rolled over while I read. The card was an incredibly long message from my husband to me on my 1st mother's day. he told me how excited he is about this baby, how much he loves me and this life we've created together. I am such a sap and so in shock of what he was telling me in this card, so of course I was crying like a nut. THEN he told me to open the bag, inside a strange shaped box, and inside that a silver bracelet from the jeweler who made our wedding rings. It's from Pandora Jewelers. It's sort of like a charm bracelet. Anyway, so I am tearing up again, as I pull out this bracelet that has one charm on it. He tells me that it's the baby's birth stone!!! I just wanted to punch him he's so sweet. Of course I was a blubbering mess for about 10 more minutes. I was speechless. okay I have to run. today is the brother-in-law's b-day and we have to grab his gift and go to grandma's to party (haha), or just sit around and enjoy all the fam's company. whatever suits you :)

    happy mother's day to all of you out there in cyberland! we wouldn't be here without you....literally.

    Saturday, May 13, 2006

    bored to death...

    ...as in I seriously might dying sit here at work on a SATURDAY. I have read every blog that I always read, I have posted pictures, I have actually done WORK at work. And I still have a half hour to go. PLUS I got a chopped salad for lunch and the guy must have put a half pound of goat cheese on this thing. I picked half of THAT off and I still feel like my stomach wants to be inside-out.

    wah wah wah...somebody call the waaahhhhhmbulance. I know I'm whining, but I just want to go home.

    my hair looks like doodie. It used to be long and down to the middle of my back. Then I got this *bright* idea to cut it the DAY of my wedding, as sort of a surprise. It looked great, at my shoulders, very choppy and funky. I'll have to post a weddin' pic so you can see it. THEN I decided to get a trim, and went to a new stylist (b/c I was living in a new state now). Back home, I had been friends with my hairdresser, so I trusted her and even gave her some freedom. This man (who wasn't gay, so perhaps therein lies the problem) made me look like I was about 12-years-old. When he used the razor he was pulling hair OUT OF MY SCALP! I gave him a crappy tip, and went home bawling to DH about how terrible it was. I called another salon the same day that I had seen while driving around that looked fairly modern. The receptionest empathized with my horrible situation and said Natasha would take good care of me, she's great with short hair (WHAT? no! no short hair! well it was too late anyway). So of course this german with a blond pixie gave me a great hair cut, choppy and "piecey" the way I like...too short, but as long as she could make it since the hair killer got hold of my head.

    so then in October (about 8 months and two trims later) I got an even better idea to cut it even shorter (since I was missing my long hair and all.....duh)! It looked very cute, sort of like Keira Knightly's hair in Domino but I'm not quite as beautiful, heehee. (It was that short in my old blog pic.) Anyway, so now I am struggling to keep it growing out. Of course it's much longer now, but the layers are all wacky, and I've even gotten trims to help. It looks like Shannyn Sossamon on a bad day (not that I look like any of these celebrities, they're just universal hair-dos :))

    the bad news?? Natasha has moved to a salon in NYC! what am I going to do!!! argh! yes I just made a short story long.

    pics

    well, inspired by annika's recent picture postings, here are a few from moi!

    this one is of DH...it's a band photo...we don't sit around with photo lights and take funny pictures of each other, heehee. okay well maybe sometimes.

    This is our dog Margot. she is so sweet and smart. she looks bored here, but she is very happy!

    My mother's college graduation...yes I am a brunette and my brothers are blond and black...we're not sure how it happened. I think I was about 5? I was doing ballet, a very bad "plie." work that feathered hair, mom! soon after this pic, my mom cut all my hair off. Everyone thought I was a boy.

    and finally, the little baby growing inside me :)

    hope these were interesting. I am at work so I only have a few, random pictures. Maybe one day I'll get super organized and post pictures that pertain to a post! woah!

    Friday, May 12, 2006

    god...I've got to put up a new photo. it looks like I'm greasy and over-plucked, and I assure you that I am not....I'm flakey and in need of a good brow wax (hahaha) okay well maybe somewhere in the middle.

    anywho...don't hate me for writing about this (it sucks when people flaunt their happiness) but I just have to say how HAPPY I have been this past month+. And DH has been too...perhaps that it part of the reason. mostly, I just need to acknowledge it because I know I could easily fly through this moment without appreciating how satisfied I feel. I still don't like what I see in the mirror sometimes, but I look in and the moment is gone before I have time to brood over it, and that is enough for me!

    good news! the morning of the day we found out we were pregnant, I got a call from my old best-friend (well we're still best-friends, but distance doesn't do it much justice) that she was pregnant...she and her husband had decided they were ready, and BAM she was preggers, a 6 weeks when she called. Unfortunately, she lost the pregnancy two days later, and was devastated...and I mean, wow. We weren't even trying and she was the one to lose her baby, completely unfair. But I told her for what it was worth that her conviction about having a baby made me appreciate so much this incredible gift God gave me...not just the baby, but the ability to have one, to have life created and growing inside me. Anyway, now that I am way off subject....she's pregnant! I haven't gotten to talk to her yet, but she sounds positive and I am so happy for her! we are very excited to be pregnant together...we even got married 3 months apart so I guess it was meant to be this way;)

    this post is random and weird. heehee

    Thursday, May 04, 2006

    blogging=going to the gym

    Sometimes when I haven't been to the gym in while, I start to forget how much I really like being there and how good it makes me feel. It isn't until I scrape my lazy a$$ off the couch and drive myself, moaning how I want to just stay home, then jump on the treadmill and go "oh yeah! this feels good! me likey!"

    blogging (maybe because it rhymes with jogging?) must be the same way. SO I have officially scraped my fingers off my lap, rolled my rolling chair over to the computer, bad posture and all, and I'm going to share with cyber space a recipe I made up. Not as fun as divulging deep dark secrets, but hey...it's what I've got today. Just a light jog. Maybe I'll sprint a few miles tomorrow, k?

    It sounds like it's, gross, but it's not...it's actually so tastey. And unfortunately you have to have a rice cooker, b/c I don't know how to make it otherwise! And just at this very moment I have a feeling I may have posted it already (?) but I'll take a chance. I'm too lazy to look.

    Mung Beans and Sweet Brown Rice

    3/4 cup Mung Beans (the beans that the common bean sprout comes from! very good for you)
    1/2 onion, any kind
    1/2 bell pepper, any color
    1+ T (ish) olive oil
    3/4 cup sweet brown rice (this is different from brown rice...sweeter, but I'm sure regular would work too)
    1 cup (ish) baby carrots...not young ones, the itty bitty ones! (i like them chopped a little, but you can use them whole)
    3 cups water
    1 T tamari/soy sauce/teriyaki

    First, rinse your mung beans twice, then soak them in water while you prepare everything else. They really don't NEED to be soaked, like lentils, but I find just letting them sit in the water a little before cooking makes the texture better.

    In a small skillet on medium to low flame, warm olive oil, then add onions and pepper. Cook until the onions start to look clear. This is to let them caramelize and give the dish some flava! While they are sauteeing, chop your carrots (if you wish!) and any other veggies you'd like really. I'm thinking of trying brocolli and cabbage too, next time. Okay....so your onions are clear, your veggies are chopped. Now drain your beans and stick EVERYTHING in the cooker (or pot if you are gonna try this manually).

    When it's ready, it's ready! There shouldn't be any extra liquid or sauce, but it is a little "creamy" from the starches. I only put a little soy sauce in while it's cooking so you can add it after, to taste. I like to garnish with green onion. Makes about 4 servings. Oh man I'm hungry.

    okay, you still awake? still here? heehee

    so I'm now 13 weeks preggers...and I feel like a fatty! My clothes still fit, but the buttons and zippers on a few things look at me like "you're kidding right?" I'm gonna post a pick later of my little bump.

    one thing I haven't figured out yet...my belly-button ring. What do I do? can I keep it? should I keep it? what will happen? I've had it in for about...hmmm...6 years, and the only person who sees it (under dim lights only, of course) is the hubby...and once his young cousins saw it while I was swimming and freaked out. That's it. But for some reason, I take it out and I look WIERD! I mean it's as If I woke up and one of my nipples was gone...okay not exactly but close. any advice out there? I'd ask britney...but well...she's a idiot, or at least plays one of TV! and besides she won't return my phone calls...b!+ch...hahaha just kidding. (I'm prob the only one who reads this, but I laugh, so it's all good) PLUS she blew up to gi-normous so maybe her advice isn't all that great....the britney prenatal diet...McD's and cheetos! would you like large thighs...I mean large fries with that? hahaha "Y'ALL I'M PREGNANT, OKAY. I CAN EAT WHATEVER I WANT, K? DERRRR!" that' my spears impression, I can do it b/c I'm from Louisiana too. Alright, truce...it's a bad impression, and we have nothing in common but the area code of the hospitals we were born in. but people are always impressed when you are from a place a famous person is from (what's with that by the way?) so I guess it's shameless PR?....maybe?